Friday, November 4, 2011

Recipe: Redneck Lasagna

DO NOT ATTEMPT TO EAT THIS IF YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH. THIS RECIPE IS WHAT WILLIS WAS TALKING ABOUT. IT COULD POSSIBLY MAKE YOU A VEGETARIAN.

This recipe is going to blow his mind, and possibly his left ventricle. That being said, I've been told it's quite delicious. In fact, Boyfriend's friends like it so much that they've offered to purchase the ingredients so I'll make it more often. I was laying around with Boyfriend when I had a vision... A vision of the perfect combination of everything that's bad for you. Alterations have been made with each version to create the nastiest, fattiest, most delicious entree of all time: Redneck Lasagna.

What you'll need:
-One glass baking dish, greased
-Large pot
-2 frying pans
-3 boxes of mac n' cheese
-Milk and butter for the mac n' cheese
-1 block of cheddar cheese
-1 block of jack cheese
-2 packages of bacon
-1 package ground beef
-2 potatoes
-Salt/pepper

1) Preheat oven to 350 degrees (sure, why not?).

2) Cut potatoes at an angle, about 1/2 inch thick. Lay in pan so they overlap a bit. Salt and pepper to taste. This layer is mean to serve as a crust of sorts. Place pan in oven until potatoes are cooked through and start to look golden.

3) While you're waiting:
-Start boiling water for the mac n' cheese, and fry up the bacon. (Cut bacon into 2 or 3-inch chunks before frying so you can fit more in the pan.)
-In another pan, start frying the ground beef- season with salt and pepper to taste.
-Also, start slicing the cheese blocks into thin strips.

4) When your potatoes are all golden, take them out of the oven, and lay down some of that glorious cheese. Put the tray back in just for a minute or two so that cheese gets all melty.


 Sweet baby Jesus, that's the stuff.

5) Now for the mac n' cheese. Your water should be boiling by now, so whip up about three boxes worth. Leave it a tiny bit undercooked, or al dente, because no one likes gooey pasta. When it's done, make a layer of mac n' cheese on top of your cheesy potatoes, and a layer of ground beef on top of that.


6) And a layer of bacon...


If it looks like this, you're doing it right.

7) We'll cement this layer by adding a layer of cheese.


"Oh no, my pan is almost full!"
**Take a moment to "squash" the contents into the pan. I like to take a piece of plastic wrap and basically push down the ingredients until they feel more compacted. Make sure to keep it all level.**

8) Now add a second layer of mac n' cheese, and more ground beef, of course. 


9) Additional layer of bacon is optional required.


Yes, I know they're the same pictures, but you get the point.

10) Add your top layer of cheese. Decorate to taste. I also recommend going through the "squashing" process once more.


11) Set oven to low, and leave in until top layer of cheese is melty, or until it's time to serve. And don't forget the most important part...


That's right- more bacon!

Worth 1,000 Words